“I mean, just so you know, it’s not that I am oh-so-upset about Jason. “I’ll try not to take that personally,” I said” – ġ9. I’ve lived here for eighteen years and I have never once in my life come across anyone who cares about anything that matters.” All the things paper-thin and paper-frail. Everyone demented with the mania of owning things. All the paper kids drinking beer some bum bought for them at the paper convenience store. All those paper people living in their paper houses, burning the future to stay warm. I mean look at it, Q: look at all those cul-de-sacs, those streets that turn in on themselves, all the houses that were built to fall apart. It’s not even hard enough to be made out of plastic. “Here’s what’s not beautiful about it: from here, you can’t see the rust or the cracked paint or whatever, but you can tell what the place really is. “Everything’s uglier close up,” she said.” – ġ8. You see the place as someone once imagined it.” You can’t see the wear on things, you know? You can’t see the rust or the weeds or the paint cracking. “We bring the fucking rain down on our enemies.” – ġ7. “When you say nasty things about people, you should never say the true ones, because you can’t really fully and honestly take those back.” –ġ6. “It’s a penis,” Margo said, “in the same sense that Rhode Island is a state: it may have an illustrious history, but it sure isn’t big.” – ġ5. It’s like picking your breakfast cereals based on color instead of taste.” – ġ4. “That’s always seemed so ridiculous to me, that people would want to be around someone because they’re pretty. Every moment of your life is lived for the future-you go to high school so you can go to college so you can get a good job so you can get a nice house so you can afford to send your kids to college so they can get a good job so they can get a nice house so they can afford to send their kids to college.” – ġ3. The rules of capitalization are so unfair to words in the middle.” – ġ2. “I’m a big believer in random capitalization. But before we can radically reshape the world, we need to shop.” – ġ1. The first shall be last the last shall be first the meek shall do some earth-inheriting. “Tonight, darling, we are going to right a lot of wrongs. The din of conversation around us quieted just a bit as he turned his eyes toward the heavens and shouted, “IT IS NOT MY FAULT THAT MY PARENTS OWN THE WORLD’S LARGEST COLLECTION OF BLACK SANTAS.” – ġ0. Radar threw his books into his locker and shit it. I don’t see why you can’t introduce her to your parents and show her casa Radar.” “Shut up,” he answered, poking his elbow into my gut. “Are you embarrassed about something?” I asked, smiling. “You can learn a lot about government from donkey balls,” I said.” – ĩ. “I decided during Government that I would actually, literally suck donkey balls if it meant I could skip that class for the rest of the semester,” he said. “I look like a demented carbonated fountain,” he deadpanned.” – Ĩ. “You’ve never seen Ben snort Sprite up his nose and then spit it out of his mouth,” I said. “But he’s never, like, invited me to hang out with you, though.” “Technically,” I added, “ you should be embarrassed of him.” “Do you think he’s, like, embarrassed of me?” We were in the business of mutual amusement, and we were reasonably prosperous.” – ħ. “Nothing really mattered that much, not the good things and not the bad ones. She said she was waiting for Radar to ask her.” “My prom prospects are so poor that Q’s grandma turned me down. “Getting you a date to prom is so hard that a thousand monkeys typing at a thousand typewriters for a thousand years would never once type ‘ I will go to prom with Ben’.”īen could not resist tearing himself apart. “Ben, getting you a date to prom is so hard that the American government believes the problem cannot be solved with diplomacy, but will instead require force.” – ĥ. Radar tapped a locker twice with his fist to express his approval, and then came back with another. “Getting you a date to prom is so hard that the hypothetical idea itself is actually used to cut diamonds,” I added. “Getting you a date to prom will be harder than turning lead into gold.” I could never stop thinking that maybe she loves mysteries so much that she became one.” – Ĥ. “Maybe all the strings inside him broke.” – ģ. “If I had a breakdown every time something awful happened in the world, I’d be crazier than a shithouse rat.” – Ģ. Mobile users: I apologize but you will have to scroll quite a bit to get past this one!ġ. Sorry I am a couple of days late with this one but there were A LOT of quotes for this one! I should have expected that from John Green!Īs always the quotes are organized chronologically, but the page numbers are from my hard cover copy.
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